Full many a gem of purest ray serene,
The dark unfathomed caves of ocean bear:
Full many a flower is born to blush unseen,
And waste its sweetness on the desert air.
Today, the entire episode was dedicated to little Hasan, who lived for barely a few days but what memories he left behind! Oh! how many broken hearts and tear-stained faces did he leave behind without a backward glance.
Did he not miss his mother's gentle caress as she hugged him to her bosom and sang sweet lullabies?
Did he not miss his father's strong hands that promised to protect him in their embrace forever?
Did he not miss his brother who had been snatched from him but who still remembered Hasan with every breath he took?
It was painful to watch Jodha and Jalal today. There are no words that can describe what they felt, what they went through, how they embraced each other through the night, struggling to come to terms with a loss whose magnitude cannot be measured or understood by anyone else.
Coping with loss is a deeply personal experience. Nobody can help one go through it more easily or understand all the emotions that one is going through. But others can help comfort one through this process. The best thing we can do is to allow ourselves to feel the grief as it comes over us. Resisting it only prolongs the natural process of healing.
Jodha especially went through so many different stages of grief today, as she tried to come to terms with the reality that Hasan was no more a part of her life.
She tried hard to deny that Hasan had gone away. She tried to convince a broken Jalal that their Hasan was alright, that he would soon wake up upon hearing her voice. This was her mind trying to rationalize overwhelming emotions and to protect her from the immediate shock. Almost all of us go through this stage of denial, to tide through the first wave of pain.
As Man Singh took away the baby for final rites, she and Jalal remained, holding on to each other, as if afraid that if they let go, the other would disappear too. They spent the long, dark night remembering Hasan, trying to understand what had happened and why, if they could have prevented it, why God had punished them for being good, how God could have spared the child and taken them instead, and how they now had only each other to live for and how they had to live on for each other.
Sadness and regret predominated the mood. Jodha kept wondering why God had not taken her instead of Hasan. Jalal was stricken with guilt that despite being the Shahenshah, he could not save his own child. The grief and depression they exhibited was subtle and private. It was their way of quietly preparing to bid Hasan farewell. No one could have consoled them at this time. Except each other. It was so heart-breaking to watch them cradled together in a helpless, - sometimes raging, sometimes sad - despair, trying to find and offer succor, even as their hearts and minds seemed ready to collapse.
Jalal was magnificent, as the man struggling to control his own bursting grief, so that he could protect and console Jodha, who had completely melted. This was a strong man, if ever there was one. Not the one who fought tigers bare-handed or waged war on enemies. But this one who could subdue his own tormenting soul so that he could soothe the broken soul of his beloved. If only I had done this...If only this had happened...If only ...There was no end to these Ifs...
Jodha and Jalal, who had always been so strong, so independent, so much in control of their lives, were today unashamedly lost and drifting in the seas of helplessness and vulnerability. They tried hard to regain control of the situation by thinking of ways in which they could have prevented the tragedy from occurring.
Towards the end of the episode, Jodha's tumultuous feelings gave way to anger, as the masking effects of denial began to wear and reality re-emerged.She was not yet ready to accept the ultimate truth. And so the intense emotions swirling within her deflected from her vulnerable soul and expressed themselves instead as anger directed towards her beloved Kanha. In her heart, she knew that Kanha could not go against Destiny. Emotionally, however, she felt resentful with Kanha for causing her pain by taking away the light in her life. Ironically, this is a vicious cycle Jodha is caught in. The more Jodha stays away from Kanha, the more guilty she will feel, which would make her more angry.
One day, both Jodha and Jalal will have to accept the inevitable. Of course, it is a difficult journey fraught with emotional pitholes. Hasan's demise was so sudden and unexpected, that Jodha may continue to live in denial or anger against God for ever. But I hope that Jalal will be able to accept and help Jodha accept the truth. This iscrucial for their peace of mind.
The days ahead are far from being happy ones. But I wish to see JJ at most withdrawn and calm rather than depressed or angry still. I wish to see them remember Hasan ultimately with fondness as God's gift to them, if only for a few days.
@All: Remember, grieving is a personal process that has no time limit, nor one "right" way to do it. Please do not judge how JJ grieved or should have grieved.
Precap:
Jodha has apparently nursed Hussein and is rocking him in her arms to make him sleep. Ruq is hovering around like a stricken hen and ultimately almost snatches Hussein from Jodha's arms and puts him in his cradle. Jodha is stunned at Hussein being taken away. Salima Begum is looking on in helpless silence.
Has Jalal managed to convince Ruq to share Hussein with Jodha?
You all are welcome to share your views, and discuss the episode...
***Important***
history_geek has updated the historical information related to this track here.>
You can also refer to the historical update of history_geek on the twins of Akbar and MUZ here.>
Historical Update - Jodha Akbar - The Twins of Mariam Zamani And Akbar